Living with Bipolar Disorder: When People Say You’re Crazy

People will always have their opinions, and we do in fact have a severe mood disorder that, no matter how great we may be doing with our meds, our therapy, diet, exercise, relationships and all those things that affect our moods, we will still occasionally exhibit the symptoms of our disease.

I often have issues where I volunteer staff several times a week. Sometimes people even say I my meds need to be adjusted, and I feel confused because my partners, my therapist, and I don’t agree. Sometimes I feel very confused because I know I’m right, and I wish I could behave in more societally accepted ways.

So much of life is about following social rules. Not pointing out mistakes to someone who is sensitive about being critiqued. So I am not wrong but I am made to feel wrong.

We will never always know that we are okay, unless we tell and convince ourselves of that. And due to the nature of our disease, we will never technically be okay. We will always be a little off. But the secret is to be around people who love and support us as we are.

Of course, if we are doing things that hurt others or break laws, we need to pay attention to that and make some changes.

But I decided long ago to not try to make everything match. We are not all meant to match. We are meant to be ourselves, and for some of us, that’s just a little bit, or maybe a lot, crazy!

But that doesn’t make us bad or wrong. We are what we are and I for one would have it no other way. The world is a bigger, brighter, bolder, and much more beautiful place with us bipolar folks in it, than it would be without.

So the next time someone says I need to have meds adjusted, I will think about it, check with my loved ones and my therapist, and address it. But overall, I will just let them have their opinion along the way. It’s only their opinion.

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About cassendre

aka Amethyste Rah, aka Amrita Waterfalls “renaissance negresse & ARTrepreneur” (musician/writer/actress/fine artist) Leeway Transformation Award-Winning founder & executive director of the Black Women’s Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002). Visit: http://cassendrexavier.com
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