Beautiful and Refined

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Dear Friendal Units!


One of my missions these days is to blog regularly. Blog as much as I poop, basically. And I poops, a lot! Well, okay, I may not be able to blog quite that much (my “releasements” as it were, tend to be on par with the more, ahem, “equine” species, if you will. (As it were.)
So, EENteeway, my buddy Kaister and I were on a trolley yesterday talking as we usually do about positive things, angels, goals and our efforts and progress at reaching them.
I suppose they might have been considered “beautiful” and “refined” thoughts (there’s a reference to this later, I promise!), so a couple of men boarded the trolley with their carts which appeared the be the sort of which one might see street vendors use.
One sat in front of us, a 20-something dredlucked brown man (brown like Moi!), and I didn’t really keep noticing him until I noticed he would turn around and look at me every now and then. He wasn’t intrusive so it didn’t bother me or find it disrespectful.
I just kept talking and at some point, he turned around and said, “Excuse me, I don’t want to bother you but I also didn’t want you to leave before I had a chance to tell you, but I was listening to you talk and your speech is really beautiful and refined.” I smiled, or probably beamed is more like it, and said, “I’m sorry could you repeat the last part please? Beautiful and…?” (I thought I’d heard “refined” but wasn’t quite sure, and wasn’t daring to hope for such a high compliment.)
He confirmed with his answer, “Beautiful and refined.” I smiled soooo hard and said, “Wow! Thank you soooo much. Really!” And then I said, “Would you be okay with a hug?” And he said, “Sure..” and we hugged – he smelled very nice, like one of those oils the brothas wear.
I said, “Are you a vendor?” He said, “Yes.”
Then a couple of stops later, he and his partner grabbed the stuff and disembarked.
Besides the obvious, here’s what else was special to me about that moment:


  1. It confirmed for me not only my intention and efforts to sound this way, but that I’m actually being effective.
  2. It reminded me of something I saw on Inside the Actor’s Studio: Robert De Niro. In the final five questions, when asked, “What turns you on?” At least I think that was the question, his answer was, “Refinement.” I love that soooo much, not only because he’s known as a master of his craft, and grew up with two artist parents who probably were the first to instill in him the concept, value, and goal of refinement, but also for the fact that he has a strong predilection for and attraction to my melanin-enriched sort of womon! I’m not saying one is not “refined” unless one has a certain level of darkness of skin – of course that wouldn’t be a good thing to say, but since the mind has so many places to go that are perfectly permissible, I have still always had the story in my mind, because it pleases me to do so, that black women are the most refined one can find. And I assure you that if I were a red-haired Celtic lass, that is exactly the same I’d say about myself and my own kind!

Enjoy life, thanks for listening, and please attend or online support my following show with ordering tix in absentia!


Wed March 23rd, 7:30pm doors/8:00pm show. Live music concert at with the wonderful He’s from England!
More trivia: I sang his song “Snow in New York” on his album Joe’s Cafe, and you can watch me singing it live at the Metropolitan Room in Manhattan here!
Tix: $12
Adults 21+ Only
Tin Angel
20 S. 2nd St
Philadelphia, PA 19107



Make yourself a beautiful day!


Cassendre Xavier
(aka Amethyste Rah, aka Amrita Waterfalls)
“renaissance negresse & ARTrepreneur”
(musician/writer/actress/fine artist)
$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning founder & executive director of the Black Women’s Arts Festival (Est. 2003 and the Women’s Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002
Musical & guided meditation albums and tracks:
(And if you’re still reading you might be interested to know I did just a few days ago post two new exceedingly explicit photos on both of the erotic websites I play and write on, which you will have to do just a little bit of research to find. Funny how this is literally the only area in my life I play hard to get in. Literally. 🙂

© Copyright 2016 blah blah blah. All respects given heretofor therein good buddy already.

About cassendre

aka Amethyste Rah, aka Amrita Waterfalls “renaissance negresse & ARTrepreneur” (musician/writer/actress/fine artist) Leeway Transformation Award-Winning founder & executive director of the Black Women’s Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002). Visit:
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